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Author Topic: Some humour from around the World  (Read 323794 times)

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Re: Some humour from around the World
« Reply #570 on: February 23, 2025, 07:56:30 pm »
Now you guys are thinking in the land down under 😃 I think we're working on Upper & lower USA now 😆
Bruce, St. Paul Indiana, USA
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Re: Some humour from around the World
« Reply #571 on: February 23, 2025, 08:09:35 pm »
Now you guys are thinking in the land down under 😃 I think we're working on Upper & lower USA now 😆

LOL  ;D
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Re: Some humour from around the World
« Reply #572 on: February 24, 2025, 08:28:35 pm »
Today's riddle for seniors...Here is the situation:

You are on a horse, galloping at a constant speed.
On your right side is a sharp drop-off.
On your left side is an elephant traveling at the same speed as you.
Directly in front of you is a galloping kangaroo and your horse is unable to overtake it.
Behind you is a lion running at the same speed as you and the kangaroo.
What must you do to get out of this highly dangerous situation?
Think logically before you track down for the answer.












 










 

 

 



Quietly get off the merry-go-round and go home!

THEN   ......................have a beer or two!
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Re: Some humour from around the World
« Reply #573 on: March 01, 2025, 08:11:26 am »
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Nick

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Tommy

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Re: Some humour from around the World
« Reply #575 on: March 02, 2025, 04:37:33 pm »
What Trump should have got.

https://www.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=pfbid0GhZvRkmPWi3EngEF7BGt11XXJUUtFremgZvDFerD8yEXLwmJRSrh9okUXkGQ5VJAl&id=834619464&_rdr
weren't you the one complaining about political posts about a month ago Tommy... :D
News breaking ..."Volodymyr Zelensky ready to sign US minerals deal" some folks don't understand what real leaderships is & top negotiating skills are.
Bruce, St. Paul Indiana, USA
"Originality thrives in seclusion free of outside influences beating upon us to cripple the creative mind."
  Nikola Tesla

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Re: Some humour from around the World
« Reply #576 on: March 02, 2025, 05:05:48 pm »
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Re: Some humour from around the World
« Reply #577 on: March 02, 2025, 08:40:43 pm »
Jim, is that a wooden blowup doll?
Tommy

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Re: Some humour from around the World
« Reply #578 on: March 02, 2025, 09:15:50 pm »
Jim, is that a wooden blowup doll?

An umbrella :)
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Re: Some humour from around the World
« Reply #579 on: March 03, 2025, 04:12:45 pm »
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Re: Some humour from around the World
« Reply #580 on: March 03, 2025, 04:14:16 pm »
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Re: Some humour from around the World
« Reply #581 on: March 03, 2025, 04:14:38 pm »
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Re: Some humour from around the World
« Reply #582 on: March 05, 2025, 10:44:50 pm »
(Attachment Link)

Scrotum Self-Repair
1991 Honorable Mention
Confirmed True by Darwin
One morning I was called to the emergency room by the head ER nurse. She directed me to a patient who had refused to describe his problem other then to say that he "needed a doctor who took care of men's troubles." The patient, about 40, was pale, febrile, and obviously uncomfortable, and had little to say as he gingerly opened his trousers to expose a bit of angry red and black-and-blue scrotal skin.
After I asked the nurse to leave us, the patient permitted me to remove his trousers, shorts, and two or three yards of foul-smelling, stained gauze wrapped about his scrotum, which was swollen to twice the size of a grapefruit and extremely tender. A jagged zig-zag laceration, oozing pus and blood, extended down the left scrotum.

Amid the matted hair, edematous skin, and various exudates, I saw some half-buried dark linear objects and asked the patient what they were. Several days earlier, he replied, he had injured himself in the machine shop where he worked, and had closed the laceration himself with a heavy-duty stapling gun. The dark objects were one-inch staples of the type used in putting up wallboard.

We x-rayed the patients scrotum to locate the staples; admitting him to the hospital; and gave him tetanus antitoxin, a broad-spectrum antibacterial therapy, and hexachlorophene sitz baths prior to surgery the next morning.

The procedure consisted of exploration and debridement of the left side of the scrotal pouch. Eight rusty staples were retrieved, and the skin edges were trimmed and freshened. The left testis had been avulsed and was missing. The stump of the spermatic cord was recovered at the inguinal canal, debrided, and the vessels ligated properly, though not much of a hematoma was present. Through-and through Penrose drains were sutured loosely in site, and the skin was loosely closed.


Convalescence was uneventful, and before his release from the hospital less then a week later, the patient confided the rest of his story to me.

An unmarried loner, he usually didn't leave the machine shop at lunchtime with his co-workers. Finding himself alone, he had begun the regular practice of masturbating by holding his penis against the canvas drive-belt of a large floor-based piece of running machinery. One day, as he approached orgasm, he lost his concentration and leaned too close to the belt. When his scrotum suddenly became caught between the pulley-wheel and the drive-belt, he was thrown into the air and landed a few feet away. Unaware that he had lost his left testis, and perhaps too stunned to feel much pain, he stapled the wound closed and resumed work.

I can only assume he abandoned this method of self-gratification.

By Dr. William A. Morton, Jr. MD, a retired urologist residing in West Chester, Pennsylvania.

"Information is not knowledge, Knowledge is not wisdom, Wisdom is not truth, Truth is not beauty, Beauty is not love, Love is not music: Music is THE BEST...   
Wisdom is the domain of the Wis (which is extinct). Beauty is a French phonetic corruption of a short cloth neck ornament currently in resurgence..."
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Re: Some humour from around the World
« Reply #583 on: March 06, 2025, 09:38:31 am »
Ouchee Wa Wa!
Tommy

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Re: Some humour from around the World
« Reply #584 on: March 06, 2025, 06:06:34 pm »
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Jim

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